Thursday, January 24, 2013

3 Reasons Why Girls Change in their Teenage Years

"Three factors make young women vulnerable to the hurricane. One is their developmental level...Second, American culture has always smacked girls on the head in early adolescence...Third, American girls are expected to distance themselves from their parents just at the time when they most need their support." 
- Mary Pipher
 
I paraphrased this quote because it takes up a whole page, but these are the three points Pipher believes causes girls to go through such extreme change during teenage years. This week I want to really examine these three factors that Pipher points out, because I feel like this page of the book really stands out. I will be going through each as thoroughly as I can and trying to analyze her points. I believe that these themes are going to be very repetitive in her writing and will often by underlying messages in all of her accounts.

Factor 1: Development
This is the most obvious and probably least disputed of the three factors. When Pipher says development, she just means puberty. There are chemical changes that go on in a teenager's body during puberty, and hormones imbalances can throw off a lot of things. Most hormone imbalances fix themselves with time, but while they are still present, it can cause changes in behavior and emotions. And on top of that, girls menstruate for the first time, which can be a frightening experience for some. Girls also develop physically, and during teenage years is when girls start to all look very different at the same time. Some girls may grow at a rapid rate while others do not start developing until later or do so at a slower rate. There was recently a very interesting column in the New York Post about how the diet of children now maybe causing them to hit puberty as early as seven years old! Most girls I know hit puberty no earlier than 12 years old! Girls have more variability in terms of body shape compared to boys. There are several classifications for girl figures, such as "curvy, hourglass, tall, petite, pear, ruler" etc. Girls become self-conscious of their changing bodies and tend to find flaws and envy other girls for features that they do/don't have. This ties in well to the next point that Pipher emphasizes.

Factor 2: American Culture
I think the body labels above are a blessing and a curse. I am an avid reader of Seventeen magazine, and I read each issue cover to cover. Obviously a large portion of that magazine is fashion-based. There are usually one or more pages in the fashion section that deal with ideas for girls on how to dress. They'll start with a theme, such as swimsuits or back-to-school clothes, and then have one model of each body type that I listed. They take their theme and dress the models in what flatters them the most or accentuates their best features, and then lists several other options for girls of this body type to wear. I absolutely love that Seventeen celebrates and recognizes all sorts of body shapes and sends out a great message that hourglass is not the only body shape that is acceptable for women anymore. What I absolutely love about this is that any girl can read this and find something that is made to make them look good. They give tips on how to hide certain body features that a girl of a certain shape may be self conscious about, such as large hips on a curvy girl. While it makes girls feel good, knowing that they aren't totally stuck with what they have, it also seems to have a negative edge. By showing short girls pants that make them look taller, or girls with boyish features to look curvier, they're still subtly putting pressure on girls to look a certain way. However, this makes girls feel less self-conscious and does more good than evil, so it is better to emphasize the different body types rather than ignoring them. Pipher even says that a part of American culture is lookism (I know, it sounds made up. I didn't believe it was a real word either, but if you click the word, there is a link to the dictionary). "Lookism is the evaluation of a person solely on the basis of appearance" (Pipher 23). I feel like we definitely all do this. Some of us try hard not to prejudge, but it also seems like instinct to quickly judge a person based on appearance. It isn't something you can fight. Unfortunately, there are also those who keep these judgments, and that is when it becomes a problem.

Factor 3: Pressure and Parents
I do not think this point is as strong as the other two. While I do agree that this exists, I think it is more of a minor issue. I believe there is a subconscious social standard that teens, especially early teens, are supposed to act out against and not be close with their parents. But I think that as time goes on and teenagers get to high school, it doesn't seem as big of an issue. I am personally very close with my mom, and a lot of my friends tell me that they are jealous that I have such a good relationship with her. I am not ostracized for it as Pipher seems to suggest. I think it is more in junior high where kids think that parents are lame and anyone who listens to theirs are losers. I think part of this separation from parents is just a natural result of growing up. Once a child is in middle or high school, they gain more friends and have more schoolwork and extracurricular activities. Along with that comes social drama and troubles with members of the opposite sex. When they get exposed to this larger group of people, they have the opportunity to connect with more people who they can share everything with instead. And it is nice to be able to do that because the other person can relate. So I don't believe that there is so much of a "pressure" to separate from parents.

Overall I believe that Pipher makes strong and accurate points in this bold statement, but I don't necessarily agree with it one hundred percent.

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Blog overview

What is The Modern Ophelia? As noted in my first post, this blog was inspired by the book Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls. Shakespeare-lovers are probably familiar with the character of Ophelia, from the play Hamlet. If you do not know who Ophelia is, she is a young woman who became so distraught with her life that she dressed herself in heavy clothing and drowned herself in a river. Hamlet was written several hundred years ago, yet the character of Ophelia strikes resemblances teenage girls today, including myself. This is where the title of my blog came from. Although the lives of girls today are drastically different from Ophelia's, the emotions of Ophelia and girls like myself are not so different. Adolescent girls today are modern versions of Ophelia. On a side note, I love this book so far. You can check out an excerpt of the book here.

This brings me to the blog itself. Each week I will be publishing a post that links to one of the topics discussed by therapist Dr. Mary Pipher in this book. The author focuses on teenage girls because they seem to change severely with the arrival of puberty. Usually, this is a negative change. Pipher even says "girls between seven and eleven rarely come to therapy. They don't need it. I can count on my fingers the girls this age whom I have seen." Therefore, these posts will cover problems that usually don't arise until junior high or high school, such as eating disorders, drugs, self-injury, suicide, depression, parents, body image, teen pregnancy, boys, confidence, and so on. Being at the end of my teenage years, I, like many other girls, have had much experience with these issues. I have either faced these problems myself or watched someone close to me go through it. These posts will reveal a side of me that people don't often see. It is not because I'm ashamed of my history. The past is the past, and I've learned a lot from myself and my friends going through these things. I know that I am not even close to being the only one to have faced these problems. I know this will sound very sad and cynical, but going through these problems is "normal" for adolescents. Not everyone will face the same struggles or to the same degree as others, but we all can find common ground with these topics.

Those who know me know that I am very open with my life, especially if sharing my experiences helps others. I know not every girl is confident enough to speak up about their internal struggles. I am not proud of all of the decisions I have made, but I am grateful that they have taught me so many things. I hope this blog will be able to give girls the confidence they need to seek help if there is a problem, or to help them not feel so alone in this crazy time in life called "growing up."

This blog is not just for teenage girls! Boys face these problems as well. However, for them it is usually not as severe or common. Why is that? I hope that by the time I finish Reviving Ophelia that I will have a better answer to that, seeing that this question is one that Dr. Pipher seeks the answer to. This blog will be written to relate to adults as well. Parents may see a glimpse into their teenager's life a gain a better understanding as to why teenagers behave how they do. Teenage boys and girls who haven't faced certain issues can learn what some of their fellow classmates struggle with in daily life. I will provide a lot of personal anecdotes and news articles to show the seriousness of these problems. I know that everyone is going to get something different out of what I post, but I hope in some way or another, it will teach you something or enable you to reach out to someone who struggling through these issues. And if you are someone who is currently struggling through these issues, I will show you that you are not alone.

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Welcome to my blog!

Hi, my name is Taylor Strauss and I will be writing about the issues addressed in the book "Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls" by Mary Pipher.